A re-take on perfectionism!
At a recent market, I had one of these special conversations that stays with you.
It’s always lovely when people are interested in the process of what you do. Initially I was explaining that working in small batches results in subtle differences because it’s about the alchemy of what is inside me in that moment interacting with the paints.
Indeed the name Flow Creativity was drawn from the concept of “flow experience”; a term coined by a proponent of positive psychology Mihali Ciskszentmihalyi - a state of mental immersion, leading to losing one’s thoughts in the task at hand.
In turn, during the market conversation, a connection was made with theology - about St. Augustine and the state of inner peace. It really is wonderful when these chance moments happen.
I’ve been wishing I could remember more, however consider this; that from a spiritual perspective ‘flow experience’ is about connecting to something beyond oneself - whether a greater force, god, the universe - and in finding inner peace through that, creativity emanates from a place of inner stillness.
So lets contrast this to our everyday states of rushing around, getting ‘things done’. And add in a perfectionist streak for good measure - we can see that ‘flow experience’ and ‘inner peace’ are not really within touching distance…
Sounds familiar?
I must confess I’m no exception to that. At times driving myself to over-do, not pausing for a sense of completion before adding more to the to-do list!
Over the years, I’ve got better at managing that, however the one area it remains present is my creative work; quite ironic, given “flow experience” and “flow creativity” eh?
I justify to myself that it’s about quality, and yes, of course that’s important.
I’ve also noticed that if I’m rushing (or in a slightly frantic “lets get it done”) state of mind, it 100% affects my work.
And if while painting, I sense that something is really not working, I wipe off the paint, and start again, or just decide to switch task and return to it another day.
However, there are other times when I’m painting and the effect isn’t exactly as intended but it could have an appeal. These pieces go into a mental “decide later” box.
And this is really what I mean about unhelpful perfectionism; to re-do pieces which already have an appeal is creating a lot more work for myself! (and yes, I’ve done this!)
But back to that market conversation….it was put to me that that work I’ve deemed imperfect has its own story and therefore its own value.
And that I could tell the story of some pieces that were not exactly as intended, but yet beautiful in their own way.
Wow!! that was quite a profound revelation for me
a) the realisation that even with all the learning from my coaching years (which I draw on daily) I was still judging my work, perhaps too harshly
b) it would be ok to share with people that it’s not always perfect
The spirit of this perspective is not unlike Kintsugi - the Japanese process of rebuilding broken pottery with metallic laquer emphasing the joins; thus celebrating the breakage as part of the history of the piece.
So here is a story about one of my more complex designs - Dusky Sky.
As well as my inner state, another aspect that plays into my work is the condition of the actual paints which, as I’ve discovered over the years, start to thicken after opening, changing the interactions between the paints.
So, rather than striving for the same exact look every time, I’ve given myself over to accepting that differences in paint consistency will impact on the designs.
But “accepting” these differences is not quite the same as “welcoming” them, (back to the alchemy from that inner state of flow….)
So I’m paying more attention to the condition of each of the paints and learning how to use their proportions accordingly - encouraging a state of curiosity within myself about how it will play out.
That doesn’t mean it all goes swimmingly though. With the most recent batch there were two pairs of earrings that went into the ‘decide later’ box; I felt they had more of a stripe than a blend.
After the market conversation, I looked at them afresh and could see the beauty and value in them just as they were.
And so now…drum roll…here are two pairs of Perfectly Imperfect Dusky Drop Earrings!
And here’s a canter through Dusky Sky batches since its inception in 2022 - do you have a favourite? Maybe you can spot your very own piece of jewellery here?
Hope you’ve found this an interesting read - with some thoughts on perfectionism and an insight into an aspect of my work. Do let me know what you think in the comments below.
Meanwhile a very sincere thanks to the people from the market conversation for prompting me to see imperfection in a new way and find the courage to share this and tell this story…